The weather today sucked so it was a perfect excuse to fill my to-do list with a big, fat NOTHING. Sitting around doing nothing all Sunday invariably leads to taking advantage of a serious addiction that there is no 10-step program for: YouTube surfing. As my mind entered into a thoughtless void, I took a stroll through memory lane, looking at old late-80s-early-90s television shows. This snapped me back into reality with a startling question: What the hell happened??

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoy my fair share of TV. There’s still a few good shows out there; House and Grey’s Anatomy are always getting recorded in this house. It’s this reality crap that I seriously just don’t get though. It’s ruining TV and ruining my life. I’m sick of hearing about those Guido tool bags on Jersey Shore. I don’t care who wins Survivor, The Amazing Race, Big Brother, or Rock of Love with Bret Michaels (*side note-has that guy showered since the 80′s? I really don’t think so.) Don’t even get me started on Bachelor.

TV used to be good. Shows had plots more than “We’re going to the bar to get drunk!” They had actual actors and actresses. Stuff was well written back in the day. Here’s a walk down memory lane people…

Some Nickelodeon classics..

Pete and Pete. I watched the hell out of this show. I really think it was ahead of its time. The intro song was awesome too.

The Secret World of Alex Mack. What ever happened to the girl that was Alex Mack?

Camp Anawana, we hold you in our hearts…

Let’s move on to what every kid growing up in the 1990′s did on a Friday night…watch TGIF!

Boy Meets World. I really loved this show. I went to school with a girl that looked just like Topanga too. I was super jealous of her.

and of course, FULL HOUSE!! Everyone loves Full House. Look how cute the Olsen Twins were!

I’m saving the best for last. If you know me, you know I have an obsession with the show Alf. Dave bought me all the seasons on DVD and I still have all my old Alf dolls. This show was my favorite and still to this day, I laugh when watching it.

ALF!

I couldn’t find a video on You Tube that had embedding enabled, so above is a link to some hilarious Alf moments.

What were some of your favorite TV shows?

Tags: daily, me, nostalgia, videos

It’s the end of a long work week, which means it’s time for the best part of our sad, pathetic and boring lives: WTF Friday! For previous WTF Friday posts, click here.

Today I realized that it’s already the end of the week and I had nothing prepared for WTF Friday. In all fairness, this week was pretty tragic (SHIT WATER!), but no worries, I wouldn’t let you guys down.

For week 3 I bring to you the new fashion craze that will surely be hitting all the runways soon. Say hello to Winkers…

Since I’m 100% positive these pants will be all the rage within the next few months, I thought of a few marketing slogans to help the creator of Winkers.

Winkers: Because pants with “Juicy” on the ass are so last season.
Winkers: When the word “dignity” no longer means anything to you.
Winkers: If you wear these, you probably aren’t walking anywhere.
Winkers: Be the talk of the trailer park.
Winkers: How to draw even more attention to your huge ass.
Winkers: Kim Kardashian loves ‘em!

Seriously, these pants have unlimited marketing potential.

Tags: WTF Friday

Today started out pretty much like every other Sunday. Dave and I ate breakfast at the local café we visit every week. He decided to go fishing with his friend, so after we ate I went and ran some errands. I came home, did some yoga, watched some TV and relaxed.

Then I decided to do some of the laundry that has been piling up. I went upstairs and separated some of the clothes and brought them downstairs to throw into the washing machine. While the laundry was going, I sat down and started playing on facebook. A few minutes later, I heard water running as if a sink was on full blast. I got up to check what the hell was going on and saw water all over the floor, coming from the downstairs bathroom. Not just water. Water and poop. The toilet was overflowing, and super fast.

I ran to the washing machine and shut it off. The overflowing stopped. I was ankle deep in shitty water.
I called Dave. The conversation went something like this…

Dave: Hel-
Me: YOU NEED TO COME HOME RIGHT NOW!!!! I DID A LOAD OF LAUNDRY AND NOW THERE’S SHIT ALL OVER THE FLOOR AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON AND IT SMELLS AND *sob* WHAT SHOULD I DO I’M AFRAID TO TURN ON THE WATER BECAUSE WHAT IF IT STARTS OVERFLOWING AGAIN!!! *sobs*

Dave: Ok, calm down. We are still on the water. And we are kind of stuck here for awhile.

Me: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ARE STUCK? DO YOU REALIZE WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE.?!? SHIT WATER, DAVE!!! SHIT WATER!!

I hung up the phone and went to my computer. I googled “Did a load of laundry and now my toilet is overflowing” (I wish I was kidding people). I found out that the reason for the overflow was probably that the sewer pipe was clogged.

Dave called me back telling me he was on the way home. Thank god. I needed help!

I hung up and Googled “24 hour plumber”. I called the first number that I found in the area. To my surprise, they were super on the ball saying they’d have someone come out within the hour.

Ok, so now I have to clean this mess. The downstairs bathroom luckily is right by the front door. I went upstairs and grabbed every dirty towel that I was going to wash today and a mop from the closet. I began mopping up the stuff on the floor to the outside, trying my hardest to not take deep breaths.

THE SMELL. GOD, THE SMELL WAS TERRIBLE. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t look down. Wait, did I just see dental floss?? Seriously?! OMGGGGG I CAN’T!! But I had to. Okay, focus. You can do this Barbara.

YOU DO THIS!!! YOU ARE BARBARA MOTHER F-ING DILISIO AND YOU CAN CLEAN THIS MESS!! OH GOD I JUST GOT SOME OF IT ON MY FOOT. SOMEONE HELP MEEEEE!

I grabbed cleanser and threw it all over the bathroom and hallway floor to try and kill the smell (and attempt to clean). I soaked through 4 towels, along with the welcome mat by the front and the mat in the bathroom. I threw them all outside. Without tossing my cookies, I managed to get it fairly clean.

About 5 minutes after the cleaning was done, Dave came home (great timing, huh?). A few minutes after that, the plumber was there. $170 later, he confirmed that the sewer pipe was, in fact, clogged. Not only was it clogged but there were tree roots growing in it. GREAT! He did something to unclog it soon the water in the toilet started going down.

I will be forever grateful for that plumber. Yes it cost $170, but within a few hours the problem was fixed. Seriously great service from that company. I know the last thing I would want to do on a Sunday afternoon would be unclogging a sewer pipe. Thank you About Time Plumbing for keeping my sanity.

Worst Sunday ever. I sincerely hope that your day was better than mine.

D2KZ28UM4ZZU

Tags: daily, life, things that only seem to happen to me